The Aging Process
It is interesting how our
thoughts change as we grow older. As an infant when we depended completely on
our parents to care for our every need, I suppose all we thought about was the
need to have something in our belly, or to have our diaper changed, or to let
us get our sleep. Life was pretty simple.
As a young child, we could think only of how much fun we
could have if only Mom or Dad allowed us to play the games we wanted to play,
play with the kids we choose to play with, or allowed us to explore anything we
wanted to explore. Once we started school, we still thought about the games,
our play companions and exploring things, but we also had to begin thinking
about more adult problems, like how to get our homework done, make good grades,
and do some minor chores around the house.
Girls started to become fashion conscious when they entered
their late elementary or early middle school years, while boys became more
interested in sporting things. Somewhere along in this period boys and girls
started noticing that there were differences between the genders and maybe even
noticing those first pangs of early interest in the opposite sex, whereas
before all there was between the two genders was outright disgust.
During the teen years, boys and girls started seriously
considering what it would be like to have a friend of the opposing gender,
possibly hold hands and maybe even share a kiss at some point. By high school
time, hormones were starting to kick into another gear and boys and girls were
seriously looking at relationships in a much more serious way than ever before.
Some started dating members of the other gender; a few even became serious and
asked for steady dates with the person of their choice. Romance was blossoming
everywhere and love often led to the first encounter with a sexual experience.
What a life changing event that was for most of us. That really brought the
genders closer together.
As a young person left high school behind, many looked
toward a work career and marriage, while others went off to college to enhance
their chances for success in life. Sex was a major concern at that age for
many. Often sex was the reason for marriage, although many mistakenly thought
it was love. Life was busy with finding the right job, the right girl or guy,
the right college, the right military service, or the right place to live. Life
was a whirlwind of activity without letup as young people got married, bought
homes, had children, and constantly tried to better their lives in one way or another.
People grew a bit older and did their best to raise their
children in a responsible manner. They worked hard and saved money for the future
education of the kids, tried to help their own aging parents in various ways,
and in general attempted to set an example for those for whose care they were
responsible.
Children grew up, went off to college, returned from
college, got married and had children of their own. The parents started
thinking of different things in life, such as the new grandchildren that were
certain to come soon. The parents noticed that life started to slow just a bit
as their children left the nest to begin lives of their own. But the birth of
new life, the new grandchildren, would serve to jumpstart life once again—for a
period of time.
There were years when the grandchildren were the center of
attraction, but even they started to grow up and repeat all the steps of life
their parents and grandparents had taken before them. The aging grandparents
started to lose their parents to sickness and death, part of the cycle of life
for all of us.
Retirement suddenly loomed just ahead, sometimes much
sooner than expected. Life took another turn, often leading to a move to a
faraway place. Now there was time to travel, take those dance lessons, swim at
the pool, or just take it easy.
As if a switch were flipped,
one day the parents would wake up and realize they were nearly alone. Yes, the
kids were still with them, but they had moved off to be married or follow their
careers. The grandchildren had grown up and started their own lives, no longer
that interested in what the old grandparents were doing.
As the cycle of life continued, the old parents sat at home
many evenings watching television, reading a good book, or maybe just become bored
and go to bed early. Their morning ritual was rising early, fixing the coffee,
having a bowl of cereal and reading the morning newspaper. Amazingly, the older
we became, the more our eyes searched the obituaries, often seeing the notices
of death for someone we knew, a friend, or maybe a neighbor or a relative, or
someone we worked with before we retired.
The older we get, the more we notice the ages of those who
are dying all around us, many several years younger than us. It makes one take
notice, hoping that we will leave things in the proper order for our surviving
spouse, or the children we leave behind. But we also start thinking of what we
still want to accomplish in life,
Paul R. Meredith
2002
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